From House MD episode 3-12: One Day, One Room —

HOUSE: If you believe in eternity, then… life is irrelevant. Same way that a bug is irrelevant in comparison to the universe.

EVE: If you don’t believe in eternity, then what you do here is irrelevant.

HOUSE: Your actions here are all that matters.

EVE: Then nothing matters. There’s no ultimate consequences. I couldn’t live with that.

—
Hmmm. I honestly don’t know what to believe. Or what I want to belive. POVs welcome.

I was watching (kind of) A Walk To Remember yesterday and Only Hope started playing and I just had to stop what I was doing and listened. I’ve seen the movie before but I guess I wasn’t paying much attention to the soundtrack so I missed this. I liked Mandy Moore’s version of Only Hope but the original by Switchfoot had me this time; I couldn’t stop listening to it. The instrumental (is that what you call it?) is beautiful and the voice of a man is more natural for the song.

I also love Switchfoot’s Dare You To Move. When you’re at rock-bottom it helps to have something that pushes you up without the pretensions of understanding and the process of justifying yourself. It gets tiring and sometimes you just have to be alone with your thoughts. I learned that I don’t owe anyone. I only owe myself.

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened before

The tension is here
Between who you are and who you could be
Between how it is and how it should be

Teka. Seryoso much? hahaha. If you feel like listening, I have the 2 songs in our music corner. Enjoy

Below is something I posted 2 years ago, on August 29, 2006, to be exact. It’s not really a poem, not a story, just something that went through my mind when I was going through…something. I called it “Picture” because it started out as a feeling that became a thought that became a vivid image in my head. Unfortunately, drawing is not within my abilities so I tried to describe the image in words as best as I can…

_____

I stand here at the edge of the cliff.

There is nothing; only the calm, the quiet, and myself in the stillness, keeping my balance, as I let time decide my fate.

The soft glow of twilight seems to reflect my own soul.

The source of the light, the sun, is a friend that vows to follow my direction.

Its presence gives me comfort in this eerie world where we are both suspended between the rise and the fall.

I give the sun a little smile and ask it not to leave for I have always been afraid of darkness.

The warmth of reassurance spreads within me though it was not quite enough to settle the tides of my heart.

I dare not move.

The littlest step backward can send me running back to the weakness that has lead me here in the first place, and the slightest bend forward can send me crashing down into the unknown.

I keep a level gaze and stare out the sandy plains; they seem endless.

I long to be saved, though there is no real danger.

I long for the hand that belongs to whom I am afraid had become a stranger to reach for me, to ask for my return.

But that is not a choice for me to make.

I ask my friend, “What awaits down there? Death?”

The sun is patient and says, “Only learning.”

I feel time as it wraps around everything and as it pushes forward, not cruel but unstoppable.

I stand still.

I close my eyes and I wait.